Am I a fool?

那天, 对你开了一个玩笑. 可是你也不多问, 就相信了.
想跟你解释, 可是又觉得很冒然, 很尴尬...
很明显, 比起从前, 你对我有点冷淡.

就那么小心眼吗? 就不能当好朋友?
需要和我徶清关系吗?

明知我要走了,也不好好地跟我道别　

说真的，你的冷漠真的令我好难受，好难受 ：（

真的好想好好的跟你说再见　bye bye

p/s: 玩笑别乱开，不然一点都不好笑

:D

Ann ann is done with her finals finally :)
She's all set to the nyc and home, just that, she needs to spend a great amount of time for packing....


p/s: I was studying for bchem this morning, and then, I realized that I bubbled in 4 wrong answers in the scantron for the first exam..... 4 QUESTIONS = 8 marks. I would get the highest score in the class (6pts higher than the highest) if I didn;t make the silly mistake :X

So in korean mood now, need Korean food...kulukulukulu.....
K-town! K-town! Here I come!!!

~~~

Breath... Breath...
Just 1 more.
Hold on!!
You can do it!!


me nearly goes insane after studying from 2.30pm til 11.30pm with only an hour break in between...
still keep my finger crossed that i can finish everything...

~ciao

...

Haiya, it's me again. I know you guys are sick of reading my post EVERYDAY. But, bear with me! Posts will be reduced when the exams are over. Promise.

Did I tell you that it snowed heavily yesterday? It did, from dawn till dusk (The weather was so warm the day before, like early spring). So, today, the earth was covered by the snow, so white, so pretty... Ah, I hope that I can go out and build a snowman or hit someone with snowballs :P Haven't done any of those since I came here. But, exams, exams, exams, really no time for those super fun activities.... All the snows melted this evening. I guess I have to wait for the next snow. Hopefully, it'll snow anytime between 20th and 23rd :)

I'm super tired today. Woke up at 8.30am today to get some reading done, but it ended up making myself more and more tired. 6 1/2 hours of sleep is never enough for me. I need my 9 hours!!! I had 1 cups of coffee thise afternoon and a bottle of ice tea this evening, but, still very tired and sleepy.... But, mol gen is tomorrow, biochem is the day after and the super duper hard food science take home is due tomorrow. All the datelines are approaching!

SLeep or Caffeine? The latter was chosen.

need to go back to DCC to get everything done! JIA YOU! JIA YOU! JIA YOU!

= (EAn) =

1 down

Just finished my physics exam. The paper wasn't that easy though.
Many people were still doing it when I left. I left early, after 1 hours 2o minute, not because I know how to do the questions but because I couldn't take it anymore. I'm too tired, too hungry, too sleepy (the exam was from 4-7pm).... So be it, I don't care no more.

3 more to go.. Need to get back to my biochem.... Ah, I'm so tired!

3 days to nyc, 5 days to Jay Chou's Concert, SEVEN days to Home!!! JIA YOU! JIA YOU!!

:)

Just in case you don't know, I'll be home in EIGHT days :P
~lalalalalala....

8 days to the warm weather
8 days to mi familia
8 days to my bed
8 days to yummy foods
8 days to DVD watching
8 days to shopping
8 days to everything I like
Just 8 days...

I'll go insane just by thinking of it @-@
I don't care I didn't get to go to Germany anymore...Bluek :P

I know I blog a lot these two days --> a sign that shows I'm escaping from studying.
NOT GOOD at all...

My roomie just asks my to him some SURPRISES from Malaysia....
What sort of SURPRISE should I give him??

:)

I was reading my friend's sis's post.
It was all about life after SPM.
Ya, Sue Yen, it's your sis's :P I'm a bit kepo.
But, the post made me think back the good old day....
The 6 carefree months with no exams, no pressure and nothing...

I still remember my last paper was Biology.
Everyone was so happy and relieved after the exams.
We stayed in the school and took many pictures.
It was the last day we're wearing the uniforms, so must take lotz of pictures. Where are the photos now??? Should try to find it after I go home.
After the photo taking, we went to Yu Wei's house coz my sis lo...She said she want to chat with with Yu Wei's sis. But, maybe, she like Yu Wei, who knows?? Hahaha!!!
That nite, all the girls went to the spaghetti restaurant in Lagenda Heights, Taco what? to had a celebration dinner! Wee! I totally forgot what we did after the dinner. After all, it's been 1, 2, 3, 4 years..... FOUR years...

Then, after few months, my sis got the Petronas scholarship. Seriously, I never expected that you'll get it :P I know I'm bad! But, you're worse because you lost my cellphone!!! The cute little Blue I bought with all my savings... that time. You better find it, or else.....

Ok, back to my post...
You know what? After you left, I'm the only KID in the house.
Huhu!! I got the WHOLE room for myself... until I left for INTEC. I bet you never have the chance of being the only KID, right?? Lalalalalala......
I'm being childlish, I know. Need to stop the crapping.

The mainpoint of the article:

Yes, we grew up. But, sweet and lovely memory will never fade. No matter how far I go, how long I left, I always carry it with me. The secondary school life was not that easy, but knowing your guys, having fun, talking nonsense with you all, having a crush on someone were always the sweetest things! Ah, I miss my school! Hope that I'll have a chance to visit my school once day=)

:'(

Really tired, so tired....
Study, study and study are what I do today and the past 3 days.
Though I have been taking final exams since freshman's year, but, I've never been this stressful while studying for it.
During previous exams, we usually have only 1 or 2 reading days, but, this time we have 5.
Thinking that I have much time to spare, I didn't start my revisions until the first day of reading day. It's really a bad decision. Now, I dun think I'll manage to revise everything.... I really screw up everything....
Ok, need to get back to hell.
I think I'll hate the DCC after the finals are over.....

....

Just had my dinner+lunch..
Today's "special" is noodle soup + ikan bilis + tofu + an egg.
Have been eating the same thing since yesterday.
Thought of cooking something special but I have finished all my supplies.
Actually, I bought a few fresh vege on Thursday but the forgetful me left it at the cashier...
I did it for again! Last time, it was the orange juice in Shoprite. Now, is a bag full of vegetables!!!
Super idiot I am...
Wanna go to get some grocery in C-town, but I'm too busy, hardly have time to go to downtown.....
Desperately hope that my exams can end asap so that I can go home and have nice food!!

Gosh, 2 reading days left, I haven't started revising my biochem yet... Will I make it?

Felt so sick these few days....
Had few Tylenol few days ago and got better, but, now, I think I'm sick again....

Exams are horrible.
Sick + Exams are super horrible!!

No, I'll never let the sickness overcome me!!!
加油! 加油! 加油!!!!

...

Ok, I decided not to write anything about the formal due to some personal reasons.
So, no post for that.

And, for the Fuyu Matsuri ~ RONS Winter Fest.... I'm too lazy to say anything about it.
If u're my facebook buddy, feel free to look at those colorful pictures :)
I did enjoy the event! Go RONS! Gambateh!

Alright, I admit I'm not in a good mood....
Good nite. and, see you guys in few more days (9 or 14 days)....

By the way, today is the last day of class...
Junior's semester is indeed much shorter than freshman's ....

Last weekend of the semester

Having a bad headache, but I can't sleep... So, here I am, blogging

"Ice Ballet in Sleeping Beauty"

Came across the info about the performance when I was surfing the net. Is Ice Ballet! Who can resist it? Wait, let me rephrase, "Ice Ballet in New Brunswick for only $10!"
Now, could I not watch it??? NO WAY!

So, I decided to put aside my paper which due on Tuesday and went for it! I was so afraid that they had run out student tickets at the State Theater. But, luckily, they still have some. Hooray, ice ballet, here I came :D

The performance was simply amazing! I've never ice skated, but, you really don't need the experience to tell how many efforts the dancers put in the performance. The spins, turns, jump were perfecto! The customs were very pretty too!

all the performers prince n princess

I know it's illegal to take pictures in the theater but everyone did that. So, I could't help....
But, I only did it the end of the show though :P



There was a tree lighting ceremony that evening at Downtown with various performance according to my roommate, Tierre. I missed it by mere 15 minutes because I was studying in the library... Ah, should have went there early~~~

The New Brunswick Downtown can be quite beautiful during the Holiday season.
It's not that scary after all :)

That was my Friday.... (to be continued)

...

Huh, just finished writing my paper. Spent the whole 3 hours typing it. Still have to do citation and editing. A long way to go... Hope I can get everything done in time.

I dreamed of Ya-lun yesterday. Oh my god, he is so handsome... as usual :P
I even managed to get his signature. Hahaha! I'm crazy!!
13 days, 13 days to go for Jay Chou's Concert!!! Yeah!!!
H Nee, are you jealous?? Is you Jay Chou! Hahahahaha....(~evil laugh*)

My room is in the total mess right now. But, I can hardly find any time to clean it up. I felt I'm living in a store room right now.... Probably need an hour or two to clean up everything.... Haih.....
HELP ME!!!

Oh ya, a new roommate moved in yesterday. Dan, he is.
(Seriously, there are too many Dans here~ Dan A, Dan B, Dan C......the list just keeps going on and on....)
Dan is kind of nerdy and quiet... I wondered how the noisy and playful Comet know him???
Anyhow, hope we all get along well :)

Ok, need to get ready to classes d! will blog about my amazing weekend in the next post :)

>< See ya!

Thanksgiving Parade

I know it's kind of late.. But still, wanna share my wonderful Thanksgiving experience with you guys :)


When I saw the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade in TV last year, I swore to myself that I am going the very next year. And,YES! I managed to keep my promise!!! ( it happens rarely :P)

I woke up at the wee hour that day, very very early..... as early as 6am [only God knows for how long I've never woken before 7am]! When I reached the train station, I knew I wasn't alone. The station was unusually crowded. Many parents were waiting for the trains with their kids ~ little kid as young as a 5-year-old or big kids like me :) I bet most of them were heading to the parade.

Reached NYC after an hour, around 8am, walked from 33th St (near Empire's State Building) to 45th St (Times Sq) just to find a good nice viewing spot (I'm a bit picky)..... Actually, I should have taken the sub to Central Park, maybe it was less crowded there....

Do you what is so special about the Macy's Parade???
It's the FLOATS!!
//Floats === Flying balloons filled with helium//

The parade started at 9am from 77th St, it took 45 minutes to reach my place.
I must admit that it was my first time seeing such big floating balloon. I was so excited!!
Gosh, they're gigantic, humongous, and BIG, REAL BIG!!
Of course, the cartoons are super CUte too :)
Smurf, Snoopy, Dora the Explorer....

What is a parade without marching bands?


Miley Cyrus n Blot
Flying Kitty :) Sesame Street Cast Uncle Ronald Pikachiu
Funny Spongebob and Horton from Dr. Suess's ~ the new member of the parade

The parade ran for 2 n a half hours... I really enjoyed it very much, didn't fell tired though I has been standing there for > 3 hours :D Yeah, I just love doing crazy stuffs like my sis, ha!

After the parade, the Times Sq. was closed down for cleaning. So, no vehicles can go through the streets. The fun thing was that we could take pictures in the middle of the usually busy crowded street! :)
Me in the middle of the street :E

Since it's still early, I walked around NYC after the parade.
Went to 34th st to get some souvenirs.. Then, from there, walked to the Grand Central at 42nd st, took some nice pictures on the way :D At first, I was thinking of meeting my seniors at an open house. But then, the place was way to far, so I went to Chinatown instead, had an early dinner at 4pm, loitered there for an hour and then went back to 33rd to catch the train.

Empire State Building.
I think it's so cool and elegant with the pitch black sky as backdrop.... Love it!

Bid farewell to NYC at 6pm++. I swear I left before 7pm though the sky was dark...
It's winter anyhow. Short day, long night...That's why I don't like winter...
Looking forward to go NYC again after the finals. Air skating on Dec 20th! Hohoho!!

27 dresses. I need just one

i'm in deep shit..
AZ formal is on this Saturday. But, I still haven't received my dress that I bought online...
4more days to go. But, I don't think the seller mail it yet. It definitely will take >4 days to reach my house...

How? How?
Should I..
1) show up in jeans?
[No! No! even the most boyish brother wears dress :( ]
2) wear the dress I had from last formal?
3) wear the same outfits that I wore during ATU Gala?
4) find a new dress in Finale? But, I'm so broke now n the dresses there are not that nice....

Haih... Should have get it when I was in nyc last Thursday.....

HOW!!!!

X(

^%&!)#*$

Overspent again this month...

NO MORE EATING OUT until I go home (bubble teas are included).
NO MORE SHOPPING until January.
NO MORE BUYING stuffs that are >$2o.
NO MORE MOVIE WATCHING and other entertainment until winter break.

I really mean what I said!
Ok, with an exception,
since finals are around the corner, maybe I can eat out when I was too busy....

SID, I'm broke, no money to treat you d. You've to treat me when I'm home :P
I want lotzzzzzzzz of bubble tea :)

Countdown

倒数..
是,倒数着回国的时间.
但不是计算十二月度假的时间.
而是, 毕业后回国的日子.

大三快念完一半了
只剩下一年半, 就要迈入人生的另一个阶段
以前都有爸妈,government(对不起, 忘了怎么併)在铺路
这次,真的得靠自己了!

对未来,还感到迷慌.
总觉得我一直找不到我要的, 目标随着心态在改,
还像浪费了好多时间...
可是,不喜欢的我真的不想参与.
喜欢的需要机会...

说真的, 好真羡慕学长们
他们都做了决定
虽然在他人眼中不一定是最好的
可是, 重要的是他们都满意自在

未来的事 我无能预测
看来只能好好地珍惜当下!

A little enlightenment I got today:
When I was on my way to my class, I felt so grateful that I have to walk all the way to my class because it means that I still can walk.
Really wanna say a big THANKS to everyone who helps, guides, cheers and loves me throughout this year.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!

星期六

最近,我还蛮懒散的...
可能因为过了第二期中考后, 我都没什么考试. 下一次考试将会在感恩节后.
难得轻松, 却有点内疚...
可是,想想, 在这两年, 都不曾好好地享受我的周末.
偶尔, 静静地写写blog, 听听歌, 感觉也还真不错!
"城市人, 把脚步放慢吧! :)"

把大爱剧翻译完了.
刚接下这任务时,心中是百般不愿, 抗拒.
可是, 边看边翻, 好像得了一些启示. 觉得这任务还满有意义的.
在不怎忙碌的棵业中抽出十个小时其实也不难嘛!

天气转冷了.好冷.好冷.
就像上次我们去迪斯尼的天气.
离上一次大家出游的时候已经一年了.
好怀念...
当时,我在心里曾默默地许愿能再次踏足此地.
可是, 何时呢?

好想家哦.
好久没打回家了.
两个星期? 三个星期?
好了, 是时候打回家. 那边星期天安门, 爸也应该在家吧!

再会(L)

~Ean~

说好的幸福呢

to sue yen,
so you like 给我一首歌的时间
i like it too :)

Yet, my favorite is still 说好的幸福呢!

For you and all of us~~~ practice time :)

说好的幸福呢
作词：方文山　作曲：周杰伦

你的回话凌乱著　在这个时刻
我想起喷泉旁的白鸽　甜蜜散落了
情绪莫名的拉扯　我还爱你呢
而你断断续续唱著歌　假装没事了

时间过了　走了　爱情面临选择
你冷了　倦了　我哭了
离开时的不快乐　你用卡片手写著
有些爱只给到这　真的痛了

怎麼了　你累了　说好的　幸福呢
我懂了　不说了　爱淡了　梦远了
开心与不开心一一细数著　你再不捨
那些爱过的感觉都太深刻　我都还记得

你不等了　说好的　幸福呢
我错了　泪乾了　放手了　后悔了
只是回忆的音乐盒还旋转著　要怎麼停呢

~~heart heart jay!~~~

Huh....

Actually you knew it, but you just failed to admit it until this last hour.
Silly you! Anyhow, wish you good luck~~~~

Stop calling me Angela! IdioT!

:)

I didn't intend to blog but, just I'm too lazy to study....
38 nee said she's going to blog about bibi n wei wei... Where is the blog and "sexy" pictures????

Yesterday, we went to watch the "Madagascar 2" and "Quantum of Solace".
Watching "Madagascar 2" sorts of bringing back the good old memory...
If I'm not mistaken, we watched it during a small SPian gathering after we left Ibrahim....
Can you imagine it's almost 4 years we watched movie together? Hopefully, we can go to GSC again when I'm back :)

Yesterday evening, we had the AZ Initiation, 21 pledges were officially inducted. I still remembered me being inducted last semester. It's so sad that Lambda is no longer the youngest class... Anyway, Congratulations and Welcome to all the MUsss!

When I came back home, I found out that the bathroom and kitchen are sparkling clean.
Thanks, Tierra for cleaning them! I felt so bad though coz Tierra never used the bathroom.

After the long day, I felt so tired and slept from 1.30am till 1.3pm. 12 HOURS! I've never slept that long yet for this semester... Huh! Anyway, I felt so energized after the long rest :D

This December, few friends and I are planning to go for a concert :) This will be my first time going to a concert. Can't wait! 38 nee, guess which concert I'm going :P

Btw, what concert do they have in m'sia during countdown? Maybe we can go together since you'll take leave for 5 whole days :)

Weekend Part II

....from 2 posts back....

Coming out from the Urban Outfitters, I went into many stores (too many to remember) before I reached Forever 21 at 4Av and 14th. That means I actually shopped 2 blocks from the Path station at 6th before came to my main destination :P


an old man with his dogs in front of the F21.. Waiting for his wife, huh?

I started diving myself in millions of beautiful clothes right after I stepped in the shop. The mission of the day was finding a dress the formal. However, I didn't find anything that matched what in my mind after spending an hour there :(
Yet, I saw a nice and cute little summer top at the sale area. It's only $4.99. Once again, the shirt was shouting, "Buy me! Buy me!"
No! No! I've to fight the temptation.

"Thou shall not buy! Thou shall not buy it! Leave it alone oh the rack!"
"But, it's soooo cheap......"

Ah, what should I do???? To buy or not to buy?

Sadly, I lost in the war at the end and surrendered to the cute little shirt.....
But I'm happy :P I can wear that when I'm in M'sia :)

Right across the F21 is the Union Square. There were many people and stalls selling art and crafts. A band was performing in the middle of the square. Some guys were playing a kind of ball games at one corner while passerby stopped by to watch their performances and skills.









It was already 2.30pm after I walked around the stalls. Then, I saw the Regal Cinema. It would be nice if I can end my day by watching a movie. OMG, they do show <>! I wanna watch!

Sheeuuuttttt! Previous show at 2pm, next show at 4.30pm. It will be very dark and dangerous when I come out if I watched the 4.20pm show...Forget about it, maybe I can watch it in Menlo later ... I hope.

I was so exhausted and hungry at that time. So, I decided to go home. To give my day at the city a perfect end (an excuse to treat myself....), I had myself a pita from the Pita Joe for lunch :)
It's quite nice though a bit expensive. But, I'm HAPPY!


Pita Joe's Chicken Shnitzel and a cup of strawberry pineapple lemonade.
$ 9.00 ++ (10% for students!)

(I know someone will kill me...)

Once in a while, nevermindlah, I promise I won't eat out for the next 2 weeks!


I was sitting at the front sit while having my meal. It's fun to watch people passing by but, it's also weird coz the passerbys are so curious about what I'm eating.....

After the meal, I took the Path train back to Hoboken and board NJTransit from there to Rutgers. Spent an hour in the Secaucus Junction, but I used the 1 hour studying (finish 1/2 of my Food Science note!)

Reached home at 7pm. Exhausted but contented :)

~Ean~

Huh.....

After 28-minute struggle, finally, Hui Ann conquered the webreg and registered all her classes for the next spring... (She got only 1 course registered during the 1st 25 minutes, which is the American Government that she might somehow drop later...)

Huh, what a big relief~~~~

Now, she get to go home and take her dinner.... at 11pm
~kulu...kulu...kulu....~

Weekend

I had a wonderful weekend! On Saturday, I went to the Soup Kitchen to serve food and at nite, Yati, Fahzan and I went to Stevens for the Malaysian Nite. I met many friends from as well as from Penn State. The Penn State people drove 4 hours all the way up here juts to attend the event!
Pictures of that Nite have been uploaded at my facebook. Check it out!

On Sunday, I went to the city instead of go home... I broke my promise to study....But, then, I just finished 3 exams last week. It's not against the law to take a small break, right :D

I left the seniors' dorm at 11am, and walked along the Hudson River to the Path train station. The scenery along the river was as beautiful as usual. Since it was Sunday, many people were hanging out there in the park and on the bank.

This time, I didn't go to 33rd St as usual. I went to 14th St instead because Yati said there are many stores including my favorite Forever 21 :) I started my day with a cup of fozen yogurt from Pinkberry.
A small regular frozen yougurt
with chocolate chips for Ann!









I've tried frozen yogurt before. But, a sour frozen yogurt? This is my 1st time. However, it's not that superb sour. In fact, I like the sourness. The taste of the yougurt is quite nice,not too sweet nor too sour. Just nice.... After finishing my yummy yougurt, I saw the Red Mango which sells fozen yougurt right across the street. Damn, I should have tried that 1st! Since I've used up my quota for dessert that day, I guess I've to save the Red Mango frozen yougurt for another time...

My 1st stop of the day was the Urban Outfitters. Yati told me they always have items on sale at the basement. So, I decided to try my luck there. They do have many cheap stuffs there indeed. I found a shirt that costs only $5. So darn cheap! It also fit my well :) Oh boy, how could I resist from bringing it home when the shirt was literally shouting "Bring me home!". Haha!

Need to go to class, to be continued....

Gleaning

This morning, I and few other students went to the Giamerese Farm to do gleaning. Gleaning is picking the leftover vegetables or fruits from the farms after the harvest season. We are collecting food for the Food Bank in New Jersey, which will distribute the harvest to the soup kitchen and the poor in the state. The project is called Farmers Against Hunger. It was started up by a few farmers that send some vegetables to church routinely. Now, after 10 years, it had become a huge project with collaboration with over 55 farms and volunteers from over the state. They even own a big truck for transporting the produce. In fact, some of the farmers even plant some vegetables for this purpose instead of for profits! Ok, it's the short intro for the whole idea.

We left our school around 9.45am and reached the Giamerese Farm at 10am. The farm is quite near. If I'm not mistaken, it's located at East Brunswick. After a short intro by the personnel from the Farmers Against Hungers, we started picking the vegetables. It was my first time working in the farm though I've always wanted to try it! Today, we collected colloid green and turnip green. The leaves of the colloid were so huge! They are bigger than my head. But, according to the other students, the leaves shrink a lot after being cooked. So, we better hurried up and picked more. After picking a bag full of colloid green, I tried turnip. It's quite easy to pull the turnip out from the soil because they only have one main root (or tuber?). I have a lot of fun doing that while chatting with Pat from Alpha Zeta. Too bad, there are only 2 of us from AZ. I was expecting at least 10 brothers to come because I saw their names in the mailing list. Anyway, there are many food Science graduate students and some local senior citizens who joined us :)

We ended the activity at 11.45am. At the end of day, I managed to pick a bag (big black garbage bag) of turnip green and another bag of colloid green. In total, we collected

2500 pounds

(~1oookg++) of fresh produce! That's a lot!!!! Big applause for all of us :D

In short, it's a fun and meaningful activity to do. So, if you are free on Monday 10am-12pm, feel free to join us for the good cause!

Fun class

Just came out from my principle of food science class.
We learned about lipids today ~ the types, properties and function of lipids.
Sounds boring?
But, it's NOT!
It is such a fun course.
I learned so many REAL LIFE applications of sugars, proteins, lipids etc in food.

For example,
Do you know why we ask Malic Acid when we made jello?
Do you know there are always a white coating on the chocolates if we put them in the refrigerator?
Do you know what kinds of starch can form a better gel?
Do you know how to make the angle cake as white as snow?

The things learned there are so "live", and definitely useful if we wanna be a chef or a food scientists :)

Today, Dr. S "transformed" us into fatty acid just to show us how fat crystals can transform form
various forms and have different packings! It's so funny! I felt like I'm in the Food Network "Good Eats" show :D

Oh my, I'm truly, deeply, madly fall in love with food science :)

Fall

秋天到了.

秋天让我想起杰伦的歌...

或許命運的籤　讓我們遇見
只讓我們相戀　這一季的秋天

好感动的一段词.
爱情可以那么凄惨却那么美...

just like that

Okay, he won.
I'm indifferent about the fact. Why am I feeling nothing about it?
On the other hand, someone not even on this land are so excited about the presidential result...
Or, should I be excited about it? I don't know...
Okay, I guess just join the crowd, saying a big "YES!" to the end of war.
PEACE!

OMG, my housemate is eating the pepperoni just like that. It is so SALTY!! He is a complete weirdo :P

好烦...好奇怪...
为什么我会把所有事情告诉他? 为什么? 为什么?
这是错的! 一切都是错的!
错!错!错!
太错了!
对不起....

Happy!

2 exams down! Left physics :D
never felt that contented since last week.
have been studying since last Thursday. Hopefully my efforts will be paid off.

But, I dun care that much coz I did pretty well in the 1st midterm for both exams *mama n jie jies know what I meant* So, if I screwed up a little bit, in which I did, this time, I still think I'll survive :D Self-Hynoptizing ....

I really can't wait for the weekend to come. So many things are going on...

On Thurday, I'll have dinner at the Noodle Gourmet with Ying Ling as usual for Yummy Chinese Food~~
Tian Yuan and Yi An might join us.... Then we'll go to the RONS.
We've missed the activities 2 weeks due to midterms....

On Friday, I might go to:-
1) Cook Happy Hour organized by the school (free drinks for over 21!)
2) Big/Lil Olympics with AZ
3) Shinai Party with Kendo Club or
4) PARTY at Helyar House! Wow!
~Have to choose between shinai party and party at HH...Both at the same times....

On Saturday, I will go:-
1) YMCA Soup Kitchen with T.Chi
2) Malaysian Nite at Stevens!

Hoho!!! Can't wait for the happening weekend!!

Ok, on Sunday, I promise I'll be a good college student. I will finish up the Chapter 5 of Biochem, Chapter 11 n 12 of Molecular Genetics, Ideal Gas Law of Physics and Lipids chapter of Food Science. I PROMISE!!! (it's a lot though...)

Then, on Monday, I will go:-
1) gleaning for the needy if the school organizes again. Feel free to join us!

And Tuesday the 11th, I can register classes for next Spring.
Have to think wisely so that I won't repeat my mistake again....
I swear I don't want any more W on my transcript!

That's my plans for the whole week!! Hopefully everything goes well....

HooRAY!

Hooray! i didn't watch any youtube this weekend.
Biggest thanks to the THREE midterms that fall on the week!
Have been start studying since Friday night. Nope, since THURSDAY NITE....
I even used the 1 hour that I saved during spring to study....Daylight savings ended last nite.

It was Halloween Weekend. Yet, I didn't get to watch scarry movies with rons and attend the Halloween party :'(

So tired right now... Today, I studied from 9.30am til 11pm......REALLY EXHAUSTED...
But, still have to continue studying :"(

...

I wish I'm a microbe...

3 exams next week

Hui Ean want to study no more....

8

It's already week 43 of year 2008. Another 9 weeks to go before year 2009 (I'll be 21 by then though I'm still trying to accept the fact that I'm already 20 :P)!

Anyway, the utmost important thing is that after 8 weeks, I'll be back to my

home sweet home :)

1 year and a half! I can't believe that I'm actually leaving my home for such a long time! Not seeing my papa, mama, jie jie and ah ma for that long! Besides, I didn't webcam at all for this year and none of them post any pictures online~~~ Really miss them and my home! Have to give all of them a BIG HUG!~~

Don't know how is everything back home....
Did mama do spring cleaning the house and throw away all my stuffs? Nolah, she won't be that mean :P
Is my bed still the good old one?
Is my desk still like how I left it? Or, did mama use it for her work?
Is the arrangement of the furniture still the same? Or, they decided to change the "feng shui"?
Are my doggies still alive? Or, are they too old d.....

How ar3 my cousins?
How many of them in secondary school now? How many still in primary school?
I totally lost count. I somehow still think Ah Xing in Standard 5 while Ah Chuan still in Standard 3, which is so wrong....It seemed that I'm still living in the past :(
How are the little rascals, Bibi and Wei Wei? Did they shoot up in these years? Your know, kids grow so fast....
How is Hong Wei and his cute sisters? Can Hong Wei speak now? I remember when I left the US for the 1st time, he was learning walking. Then, when I went home last summer, he could run already!
p/s: should jie jie buy anything? no time for shopping tho~~~

How is my hometown then?
The Village Mall was open soon after I left home last year.
Is it nice? How is the first Starbucks in SP? Most have a look :)
How is the cafe I used to go last summer, where people sing? Is it still there? I couldn't even remember the name.....
Talking about my hometown, I can't help but thinking about the 24hours Nasi Kandar restaurantsss... Really miss my midnight Roti Canai! Yummy yummy!

There are so many food I'm dying to eat..
The list includes but no limits to (list is not in order):-
~Steamboat
I demand steamboat on the 1st day I go home :P Just Kidding! Any homecook food is good!
~Nasi Kandar
Papa brought me to eat Nasi Kandar when I reached Penang from US last summer...
~Nasi Lemak
~Chay Mee
~Roti Canai
~Mama's Rendang
Haven't eaten that for 3 years coz mama didn't cook it last summer :'(
~Hokkein Mee + Lo Mee
~Laksa (air itam's laksa would be the best!)
~DIM SUMssss!!!
~Hainanese Chicken Rice
~Keoy Teow Th'ng
~Pizza Hut's Pizza (the only pizza I like)
~Bak Chang
~Taoz, you guys promised me :P
~Sake sushi, all of you went there except me...
:
:
:
Too many already......

Last but no least, I miss my secondary school friends so much! Met many friends last years before they left SP to pursue their studies! Hopefully, we can meet again the time! Let's have bubble tea!! Nonetheless, I didn't see some of them for about 2 years. Really can't wait to hang out together :) Tarzan, can't wait to see me huh? Haha, you're at home now, rite?

8 weeks, 8 weeks, 8 weeks! 加油! 加油! 加油!

:D

he said he didn't give a damn of getting a W
it makes me think a lot about myself
am I too academic oriented?
am I too narrow minded?
am I restricting myself to a small and confined world?
But, I really don't know I can do well besides studying?
I'm so bad at communication and other stuffs.
I'm so miserable and doubtful....

Did sth real bad and really sorry to a person
SORRY! SORRY! SORRY!
I'm miserable. But, you're never here...
Time to move on, I guess?

Was looking at the pictures taken few years back while I'm still in SP n INTEC.
After years, I seemed to forget all the sufferings I had in Ibrahim n INTEC. All left were the sweetest memories ~ memories of celebrating everyone's birthday, memories of attending seminars in Putrajaya etc etc..
Maybe few years later I'll forget all the hard time I have now, so, why not create more sweet memories that would be remembered forever :)

Love you, friends!

Ean

Pretty pretty fireworks

Tomorrow is Rutgers Homecoming Day, the day where the alumnae came back to their Alma mater. There are some huge celebrations at the campus today, mainly at the College Ave. Some sort of concert or party, I guessed. And also, FIREWORKS!! My favorite!!!
Tomorrow is the Homecoming Football Game. Many seniors are coming back for big and small gatherings! What I mean by Seniors are not only some recent graduates, but also seniors in their 90s, 80s, 7os, 60s since Rutgers have been here for 244 years...... Too bad, I'm going to DC tonite, or else, I won't wanna miss the event... Hopefully, I can participate next year, my final year before becoming an alumnus of Rutgers. Wow, an alumnus of Rutgers! A lil bit......weird. Hopefully, I survive :)

:)

I just came back from College Ave for the Club. We learned a couple of Japanese phrases today, but, I can't really remember them anymore :'(

Thursday nite is today. SO, as usual, the bus was so crowded with people who were heading for party, mainly at the Fraternity Row. Yeah, there is no Friday Fever for college students, we have Thursday Fever instead ....

When the bus was about to took off from the Frat Row, a cute Asian guy boarded on the bus. He looked so smart, but not the book worm kind of smart. I felt the "movie star" aura surrounding him, 他身上就这样不断地散发出明星气质.... I just can't help to take a second glimpse at him, hehe... I had never seen such a handsome guy in the real world. Can I say he is a bit like a Leehom @@ Haha... Ok, I guess ABC is not always horrible :P

Ok, tomorrow is Friday, I'm giving myself a little break from my schoolworks. I'm going for a little trip to DC!! It is for raya celebration in M'sia embassy. The last time I went there was during my freshmen year. Since I'm not sure whether I will be able to go there again next year, I decided to go this year. Hopefully, it'll be a fun trip. And, this time we're going as the Rutgers, not will Stevens anymore!! RU RAH RAH

Ean

可惜

真可惜, 没能参加上个周末的聚会.
本来有两个gatherings
一边是社团的,一边是马来西亚学生的.
最终选了后者.

可是, 刚刚看了社团的照片, 那位帅帅的学长去了....
好可惜! 真可惜! 好久没见到帅帅的他了.... 哎哟!

最近在重看"宫", 觉得韩国男生也蛮帅的 ^^
就像剑道社的那位单眼皮男生, 高高的, 静静的...
真是我喜欢的类型 :)

觉得自己真是花痴+白痴!! @.@

:)

明天是biochem的期中考.
终于读完了....
虽然担心,但是不管了...考就是了.

我发现我好像越来越爱享受了.
以前的我可以为了读书,规定自己每天只看一出戏.
先在,假使不上网, 我也不爱看书... 真糟糕!
I felt so guilty.... still and so guilty for dropping the Experimental Biochemistry...
Who can help me let go of that feeling?
It has been bothering me for weeks....
I'll go crazy if I kept on thinking of it.. of the failure.....

This evening, a weird thought somehow crossed my mind. I was thinking what kind of life my mom had when she was 20. I'm sure she wasn't worry about whether she would pass her biochemistry test like me. When she was 20, she just finished her form 6. Was she trying to get a job? Or, just stay at home waiting for her stpm result? I'm so curious :) help me ask her la!

Recently, I think I have more and more unattainable desire. I want this and that. Deep in my heart, I knew it's hard for me to get it. But still, I hope for it. It's so unlike me. The old me never wished for anything she couldn't never get. She just accept what was given and enjoyed it.
I know it's good to hope for something better. But then, I'm so bad at stress management. The thought of not getting what I want really stresses me out... I hope I could become the old me that wish for nothing I could not never attain.....

HuiAnn

..

Ok, 我还没死.
中午,考过molecular genetics了.
感觉还ok. 因为教授满懒的, 竟然把textbook end of chapter 的exercises当考题 ~~lll
anyway, 考了就是时候把所有给忘了:P

The professor is not that diligent. but, I think I'm lazier than him.
I am motivated to study anymore. Just wanna watch tv and go to club activities.
such a bad student I am. I think I've made some sort of timetable to discipline myself....

My semester didn't start as good as I wanted.
Yet, I've been thinking a lot.
Thinking about what I really want, why am I studying, what is the purpose I choose biotechnology, what do I want to do in the future with my major...

Sometimes, when you're too preoccupied inn doing something, you just lose or forget the purpose of doing. In these 2 years, I've been taking courses for the sake of fulfilling my graduation requirements, and I stopped thinking of why I want to take the courses....

In these few weeks, after a challenge after another, I finally realize why I wanna go into the area I am in. I don't think I am into designing some super powerful drugs for the pharmaceutical industry..

But, I remember that evening when I told you my dream....

The dream I've forgotten yet found.

May my dream comes true.

我完蛋了!

我就完蛋了...
我死定了....

My life is crappy

I spent time blogging instead of studying
I attend club activity instead of studying
I watch youtube instead of studying
I surf the internet instead of studying
I check mail five times instead of studying
I chat thru msn instead of studying
I AM SO DEAD
coz next week I've first exam coming up X(

:)

Read a couple of blogs by my friends.
Everyone seemed so stressed out!

Coursework, exams, quizzes have put a heavy burden on us these days.
Learning is not as fun as previous years.
But,

I hope everyone will be fine.

Remember to breath, smile and laugh often :)

~Ean~

Housemates

I mentioned in my previous blog that 3 of my housemates moved out last month, right?
But, did I tell you that the new guy that moves is a cute guy? @-@

Ok, Marley, Charlton and Angela moved out.
The new tenants are Ricardo, Tierre and John.

Ricardo was a philosophy graduate student from Mexico.
He is quiet most of the time and studies very hard just like me.
He is quite tall tho, more than 6.5 feet, I guessed ~ Real Tall~

John, preferably known as Comet as it's his cool middle name, is the cute guy I mentioned :P
He is quite tan because he is a beach guard and like to surf. ~Beachboy~
I think he's cute not because of his "color", but he has dimples!
They made him looked so cute and attractive!!! Hahaha! (I love guy with dimples :D)
Don't worry, I'm not going to fall in love with him tho coz his gf, Tierre is moving in soon.
She will reach here on Wednesday.
Can you imagine, Tierre, a native Californian is moving to NJ just to be with her boyfriend?
The power of love is just too great!
I never met her before, but I believe she is as nice as Lora, Ricardo and Comet!

Yesterday, I went to the Rutgers Farm.
Marley, Charlton, Lora and their friends were having BBQ there and chatting...
It's a wet and cold night, but sitting near the camp fire made me warm.
That was the first bonfire I ever went in US.
I remember going to my last bonfire when I was in Form 2, with the Scout.
It's was memorable night, but, after spending 2 hours there, I have to work like hell today to finish up my homeworks...

_Ean_

a sad day

The is the 1st time I felt so helpless during my college life.
So frustrated with my inability....

To be frank, I cried in front of my adviser this evening.
I have never cried outside my home before, never ever....

Yet, I was so stressed out after the Biochemistry lab and lecture yesterday.
I so wanted to drop the lab courses but I was so afraid of getting a "W" on my transcript...
Though I managed to suppress my feeling for a day, I could not take it anymore after I met with my adviser.
Tears just kept rolling down right after she said, "You looked so upset."
This was exactly how I felt these 2 days, NO, these 3 weeks after the school starts.
I just couldn't keep the feeling to myself anymore...
I need someone to talk to, someone who really understands the situation...

You must be wondering what the situation is...

I was taking the Experimental Biochemistry a 3 credit hours course.
Though it's 3 credit hours, the lab ran from 9pm till 2am and there is a lecture for the lab.
So, we have to spend 6 hours in total in class.
According to the norm,
3 credit hours = 9hours per week
Since we already spend 6 hours in class, we should spend another 3hours .
But, there are ways too many readings for the labs, not to mention about the FORMAL lab report which have to include everything from abstract to references which has to be done EVERY WEEK...

Maybe I set such a high limit on myself, thinking that I can survive any subject I take.
But, with so many classwork from each of the 5 courses, I really could not handle it anymore.
It's just way too much....
I didn't even have time to cook and eat dinner yesterday. It's just crazy...

After have a long chat with my adviser, though I was crying throughout the meeting, I decided to drop it. I didn't care if I got a "w". Because, deep inside myself, I knew that I'll be very sick physically and mentally after this semester if I continued with the courses.

I have thought a lot these days.
Is study really that important?
It took me a while to understand that I'm not just a student.
I'm a daughter, a sister, a friend, a roommate, a member of the society, of the country and the world.
I am a human being made with blood and flesh!
I shouldn't let my schoolwork takes up all my time.
College should be a place where one grows up to be a better person, not to be a nerd....

I didn't have a long chat with my family for a while...
I wanted to talk with my mom yesterday, but I dropped my phone and broke the screen of the phone. So, I couldn't retrieve any phone numbers from my old phone...

~Ean~

Change

OK!
Time for change.
It's not that I don't like Friendster blog (the new layout is pretty cool), but, I keep on facing some technical problems...
I guess it's time for me to bid farewell with it...
If the problems are solved, I might return to that blog tho :)