最近 好忙也好烦..
下星期有两个考试.
Aiyo, I think I'll just write in English. I can't type fast in Chinese..

I have 2 exams next week. I haven't touched my paper since spring break. Ah, dateline is approaching.... I think I'll start working on it this weekend. Luckily, I signed up for the tutoring, or else, I'll procrastinate til the very last day and call up my sis again at midnight.
No a good experience at all!

Next week, I have biochem exam. I have been studying these few days for it. But, progress is still very slow. Maybe, I'm still in the spring break mood :( I just couldn't find that "thing" that will push me to study harder.. I must do better than the last time!

Just now, a senior told me that she accidentally found out my standing in a course. She said I did very well, very well -- I got the highest final grade in a course last sem. But, the moment she said that I quickly say, "No, I am not!". After a few seconds, I started to question my reaction. Why on earth I deny it?? I knew I did pretty good in that course. Why can't I just agree with her, acting like Americans when they receive compliment? Maybe, maybe, she will hate me or something, so I chose to deny it.... But, it turned up that she actually felt happy for me; she even wanna tell the professor that we are from the same country! There was no hostility in her words at all. She just wanna compliment for my good work. Suddenly, I felt bad; I felt bad for judging her....

Why I become so afraid to tell the truth when it comes to my results?
After a thorough thought, I guessed there are 2 reasons:
1) I am afraid that ppl will hate me if I get a higher score.
I just don't like that kind of competition feeling among peer. It'll just draw you away from your friends. It's not pretty at all. During my freshman, my lab partners acted very unfriendly towards me when they knew I got an A for my Bio midterm, ya, it's not even the final exam. It was not fun. I ended up didn't talk much to them until the end of semester.

2) Same as the 1st one, I will hate that person if I get a higher score.
Ya, I'm typically Asian. It's all about kiasulism. Maybe, it's how we grow up. Remember, in elementary school, there is always a boy/girl who carries a notebook to jot down everyone's grades after each exams. Sound familiar, right? It seems that eveyone is taught to beat others since young... So, to avoid myself from hating others unneccsesarily, I choose not to know others' business. In turn, I get very protective for my grades. Silly??

Maybe it's time for me to change my attitude.
when someone asks about it,

TO TELL OR NOT TO TELL?
What do you think?

Answer it, and I talked about the second thing I'm 烦ing in the next blog.
I guess I'm not going to write about Philly trip anymore. Pictures will be posted on fb soon is fb didn't reject my upload. And ya, I removed last blog :P after realizing that my blog is not that a private space. Everyone can just come in and out like going to a public toilet. You never knew who will stumble on it @@ So, I better reserve that kinds of stuff :)